So, you’re sitting at the Citadel trading desk, minding the Fed’s your own business, planning your weekend, when alarms suddenly start ringing. You glance up and notice the market is in danger of closing in the red for the day.  Not good!

You scan the monitors, and sure enough, VIX crept back up above last week’s lows!  Jinkies!

Fortunately, you have at your disposal the ability to turn it all around in a jiffy with just the click of a mouse.

A few seconds later… VIX monkey-hammered by 5.3%, SPX closes up 3.45 on the day.

The universe is safe for democracy.  The American way of life is preserved for at least one more weekend.  Time to celebrate!